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Real World article
(written from a Production point of view)


"Captain's log, stardate 95.9066. The Romulans, that war-mongering race that lives just outside the known galaxy, and the Klingons, the sworn enemies of the Federation, have not shown their evil faces or tried to attack any civilized outpost for weeks. The Enterprise basks in the unusual peace. But in its place, the crew finds other things to occupy themselves with…"

Scotty reports to Kirk that the shipment of robots, that he ordered two months ago, has not arrived. Meanwhile, Commodore Steve Decker calls from Starbase 10 in the Vega system. He tells Kirk the disturbing news, that Romulan pirates are stealing robots and training them to be a vicious mechanical army!

In an attempt to catch the pirates, Spock sets up a decoy robot shipment in the Vega system. Just as he predicts, the pirates attack the decoy freighter and the Enterprise speeds in at nearly warp factor nine.

The pirates are captured, and Kirk, along with Scotty, Chekov, and Frank Tanka, disguise themselves with the uniforms of the prisoners and put the pirate ship on autopilot, headed for unknown for the super-secret robot base.

On the way, Kirk orders Scotty to re-program the leader robot so that it will not fight, Scotty goes to work.

They find the super-secret robot outpost on a small moon on the edge of the Federation galaxy. There they meet Pragmar, the Romulan who is in command of the Romulan robot army. Still pretending to be pirates, Jim Kirk introduces himself as "Jimkirk, leader of these pirates", and Scotty presents Pragmar with the leader robot, which he quickly and cleverly names "Mastero" on the spot. Pragmar is impressed with the mighty metal man. Listen file info

In private, Scott informs Kirk that he is not sure if he was successful in the reprogramming, and disturbingly they later watch a speech given by Mastero to his army in which he proclaims that the Federation will be destroyed.

Then, Pragmar reveals that he knows that Jimkirk is really James Kirk, and informs them that they will all be killed by Mastero and the other robots.

When Pragmar orders Mastero to kill the Federation spies, Mastero attacks the Romulans instead. Scotty reminds him to only capture the Romulans, not kill them.

Back on the Enterprise, Spock admits he admires the logical robots, so Scott brings in Mastero to meet him.

Memorable quotes


- James Kirk, very surprised to hear from Steve Decker
Listen file info

"I would calculate that we should hear something at any moment."
"Any moment, Mr. Spock? Isn't that guess rather optimistic?"
"Captain Kirk, please report to security, the decoy ship has been attacked. Capt. Kirk report to security immediately."
"As I was saying, any moment, Captain."
"Mr. Spock, your Vulcan logic never fails to amaze me."

- Spock and Kirk, with a brief interruption from Mr. Tanka

"Captain! We have just entered unknown, unexplored regions outside the galaxy!"
"Don't worry Ensign, the ship will bring us to our destination safely."
"But what happens when we get there, Jim? I bet the place'll be crawling with Romulans."
"Crawling? With those bloodthirsty beasts? By the stars Captain, will we ever get out alive?"
"If my plan works, Mr. Chekov."

- Chekov, Kirk, and Tanka, as Kirk expresses great amounts of confidence in himself

"Easy there, Mastero, easy. Don't hurt him, just capture him, capture all the Romulans."
"Capture-the-Romulans. It-will-be-done… friend Scotty."

- Scotty and Mastero

Background information

  • Chekov mistakenly says Klingons when he means Romulans.
  • Unlike the earlier comics in this series, Uhura and Chekov are both pictured properly.
  • The Romulans are pictured as greenish tinged Humans with Peter Pan-like shorts and dark green-skinned legs or leggings.
  • This story uses a narrator in a couple places, most notably the battle between the Enterprise and the Romulus II.
  • With Chekov referred to as ensign, this narrows down the time period of this story to the 2260s, as Chekov was a lieutenant in the 2270s. This is in contrast to the fact that all of the releases of this story feature cover artwork depicting crewmembers in 2270s uniforms.


  • This story was released a total of three times during the Peter Pan Records run. It can be found on Records #15, #21, #22.


  • Like other later releases in the Peter Pan Records series, the Stardate used does not correspond to the standard format for the dating system.


Canon characters listed below are linked to the main article about them. Non-canon characters are not linked, but those that recurred, appearing or being mentioned in more than one story, are defined further in Peter Pan Records characters.

Regular and recurring

James T. Kirk 
USS Enterprise's commanding officer, a Starfleet captain.
Half-Vulcan Enterprise XO and science officer, a Starfleet commander.
Montgomery "Scotty" Scott
Starfleet lieutenant commander serving as Enterprise chief engineer.
Starfleet lieutenant serving as Enterprise communications officer.
Pavel Chekov
Enterprise navigator, tactical officer and assistant science officer, a Starfleet ensign.
Frank Tanka 
Starfleet officer serving as security crewmember of the Enterprise.


Steve Decker 
Commodore in command of Starbase 10.
Evil Romulan leader.
A large robot with "almost Human arms, legs, and head." He was the leader of the robots on the pirate ship.


Shiny, marching metal men.
Vega system 
A primary attraction for the robot-stealing pirates.
Starbase 10 
A starbase in the Vega system commanded by Commodore Steve Decker.
Priority One call 
Very important.
212 frequency 
A frequency.
Pirate Ship Romulus II 
A Romulan Pirate ship with a crew of five; captured by Kirk and used in a grand ruse against the evil Romulan savages.
Laser Rifles 
Weapon used by the Romulans against the robot army.
Water pistols 
A weak weapon.

External link

Previous audio production: Series Next audio production:
"The Man Who Trained Meteors" Peter Pan Records "Dinosaur Planet"